Part 16: Life is very short

Lately, I have been experiencing what scientists refer to as 'human emotions'...

If you’re not a motorsport fan you may have never heard of Craig Breen, let alone his tragic death in a testing accident in April this year. Typically, I don't feel particularly devastated when famous people pass away, even if I particularly admired their work or personalities. I didn’t even cry when Bambi's mum died. I can't explain why; that's just the way it is. I didn't even know that much about Craig Breen before his death either. He wasn't one of the main stars of the WRC, and he only had one full season in it. Yet here I am, months later, still thinking about his death with tears welling up in my eyes. For some reason, his death knocked me for six. I aim to delve into the reasons why as I write this.

It feels like death comes too soon for nearly everyone, whatever age they die, but Craig was truly too young (33) and had so much more to give. Sadly, this holds true for many people who have lost their lives. So, what sets Craig apart in my mind?

His thoroughly Irish blarney, coupled with a reputation for dedication and passion for rally, made him the most endearing character in the sport. He’s a big loss to the WRC in that respect. But there's more to it than that.

At this point, some of you may be thinking, "He died driving a car recklessly for no reason. It's sad because it's an enormous waste of a life." I beg to differ. I recently watched a short film called 'Group B' starring Richard Madden from Game of Thrones. It depicts a rally driver from the 1980s who accidentally killed his co-driver and struggled to come to terms with it. The film excellently portrays that, despite the evident danger of Group B rallying, the competitors felt compelled to do it. I think it’s the same mysterious draw that has led people to risk their lives summiting mountains, blasting into space and crossing poles. They didn't engage in these activities solely for money or fame, and the enormous risks didn't deter them. Deep down there was an irresistible force pushing them. There's something innately human, something essential to humanity, about these types of people. It's a good thing that not everyone is like this, but it's a great thing that such people exist to move us further as a species, to show us what's possible and push the limits. Craig's life and death were the complete opposite of a waste. He lived and died doing precisely what he wanted and needed to do – something that most of us will never experience. For me, there is no better life lived. So, for me my sadness comes from somewhere different. 

I have always had a soft spot for underdogs. Perhaps it's because Craig was a genuine underdog who finally had his day? After years of grafting his way up the slippy pole of motorsport he’d earned enough kudos to seal his first full season in WRC – leading M-Sport’s charge for 2022. Unfortunately, it turned out to be an annus horribilis. Perhaps the pressure of his big break got to him. Maybe it was bad luck. Or maybe it was both. Regardless, Craig had an absolute shocker. At the end of the season his two year contract was cancelled and his reputation was tarnished.

However, there was a glimmer of hope for the following season. In true underdog fashion, he was given a lifeline and offered a partial season at his former team, Hyundai. They saw through all the negative headlines, and knew that his talent hadn’t suddenly disappeared. Quickly, he repaid their faith by securing an extraordinary and unexpected second place at Rally Sweden.

During an in-car interview at the event, a sweaty and wide-eyed Craig uttered a line that struck a chord with me, both then and ever since: “Don’t let anyone ever put you down, because only you know your true potential”. Doubt, particularly self-doubt, has often plagued me. Perhaps his words resonated with me because I was beginning to experience what he had described within myself. As my confidence and competence in motorsport and my professional career have grown, they have started to overshadow my doubts, and real or imagined doubters. Perhaps I only needed to hear it said out loud, and see that it can be true for it to come home to take root in my own life.

Another quote that embodies Craig in my mind is: “Don’t forget to enjoy. Don’t forget to have fun. You have to have fun. Life is very short.” Clearly, what lends the most weight to this quote is the tragic prescience. But there’s a more personal aspect to it too. As I grow older, I increasingly realise how fleeting life truly is. But, it’s more than that. It’s a reminder to have fun because it is so short. Whatever you’re doing in life, enjoyment is by far the best fuel to use, and fun the best reason to do it. It's a lesson I've sorely needed reminding of as life has become increasingly serious in recent years. As I witness my daughter's transformation from a baby into a girl right before my eyes, and I know this time can never be repeated. Therefore, I must remember to relish it. The same applies to Rally Quest. There is a finite number of years to achieve what I'm capable of – but it’s only worth doing if it’s fun. His words served as a reminder to both seek and cherish the experiences of life because they are a tremendous privilege and ultimately finite.

For your inspiration and for your lessons – thanks Craig.